They Know What You Did Last Summer
by Beer Good
Summary: Season 4. The 'beer is evil' rule is temporarily lifted when Willow has to suffer through the worst humiliation imaginable. After all, what can possibly be more embarrassing than... parents? Buffy, Willow, Xander gen.


**Title:** They Know What You Did Last Summer  
**Author:** Beer Good  
**Rating:** PG13 (brief discussion of teenage sexuality, drinking)  
**Fandom/timeline:** Buffy, mid-to-late s4  
**Word Count:** ~800  
**Characters:** Buffy, Willow, Xander  
**Disclaimer:**: The characters belong to Joss, yada yada.  
**Summary:** A reply/sequel to **stormwreath**'s fic "How Willow Discovered Online Porn". Read that first if you can, it's at his livejournal. Then join me for a short scene from The Bronze featuring three friends, a certain amount of drinking, and tales of the most horrible torture... I mean embarrassment.

* * *

**They Know What You Did Last Summer**

"¡Compadres!" Xander plopped down on the free seat next to Willow and Buffy, emphasizing the _¡_ to be heard over the usual din at the Bronze. "What better way to relax after a hard day of manual labor – or non-exhausting lounging in halls of learning – than with one's friends and... beer?" He frowned as he noticed the three empty glasses sitting in front of Willow, and intercepted the fourth one as she lifted it for another swig.

"Hey! Get y'own!" Willow yanked the glass away from him, spilling about half the content on them both.

"Will... we talked about this. Remember the wacky demon-magnetty hijinks?"

"Shuddup. I need it." Willow took a deep gulp, then stared miserably at the last few drops left in the glass. "'S not foamy at all."

Xander turned to Buffy, who had been watching the exchange with an amused grin while nursing a single beer of her own. "Buffy, how can you let -"

"Actually, Xan, she's right. She really does need it. After all," Buffy's grin widened and Willow winced, "it's important to allow young women the chance to make mistakes in a controlled environment. And after what she had to go through today, I'd say exceptions get to rule."

"Why? What?" Xander did a quick bad-things-that-could-conceivably-happen count. "Did something...?"

"Tell 'im and I'll smother you in your sleep." Willow's threat sounded more like a half-hearted plea for mercy.

"OK, now you _have_ to tell me."

"Really, it's nothing." Buffy stifled a giggle and put her hand on Willow's in a gesture of solidarity, which Willow either didn't appreciate or completely misunderstood, since she jumped back so quickly she spilled the rest of the beer on the floor. "We just had an... unusual lecture today in Psych 101."

"And 'unusual' leads to 'mop me up off the floor' drunkenness?"

"Not usually. I mean... uh, we were learning about how psychosocial attitudes change with age, and they had invited one of UCLA's leading experts in Women's Studies to discuss the..." Buffy gestured awkwardly. "..._changes_ a girl goes through when she reaches her teens, social taboos, their need to keep certain things secret, and how their parents and peers handle it. Which she did, with examples from her own experience as a mother."

"So...?" Xander looked back and forth between Willow, who had wrapped her arms around her head and seemed determined to fuse her forehead with the spreading puddle on the table ("Lalalala, not listening!") and Buffy, who was desperately trying to keep a straight-and-Willow-sympathetic face. "So you had to sit through a lecture on stuff you already know about. What's the problem?"

"Actually, _Dr Rosenberg_'s lecture was really interesting."

"...Oh."

Buffy's face was turning almost as red as Willow's by now; whether it was from shared embarrassment or from her attempts to keep from laughing was hard to tell. "For instance, did you know that it's perfectly natural for girls as young as 13 to start mast-"

"_BUFFY SUMMERS_!" Willow jerked her head up and glared somewhat out-of-focus at Buffy, blinking away the beer running down her forehead. "Can't you just... stop talking? Please? Our whole class heard about it, d'ya really think Xander wants to..." She shot a pleading look at Xander, who quickly (if not quite convincingly) assured her that he had no interest at all in the matter.

"So your mother actually stood up in front of you and talked about... things-parents-don't-know-about stuff?"

Willow mewled. "For 90 minutes. _Everything_. 'Cept, y'know, we're talkin' 'bout my mom so I'm pretty sure she had no idea I was there, and it wasn't like I's gonna stand up in front of everyone an', an', an' _tell_ her to stop talking about ... y'know... stuff like..."

"...Washing Oz-sheets after graduation?" Buffy helpfully added, to which Willow gave another groan.

"Beer now. Please."

"OK, one more and then we're taking you home." Buffy stood up and started towards the bar, then turned back and put her arm around Willow. "You know we've all been there, right? I mean, maybe not as publicly, but..."

Xander raised his hand, and then let it drop supportively on Willow's shoulder. "Naked in front of the whole class. Fun times."

Buffy gave Willow an extra Squeeze Of Friendly Encouragement. "Yeah. So, if there's ever anything you need to talk about, you can always tell us. Or not, if you don't want to, which is OK too. For instance," she grinned, "if you want to spill about that new guy I can tell that you're into but you haven't actually told me about yet..."

If Buffy had expected Willow to reply in any other way but to once again groan, turn red and plant her face in beer, she would have been disappointed. But it just seemed to be that kind of night.


End file.
